Tag Archives: confusion

Uncertainty

Uncertainty of life

Uncertainty of happy times

Uncertainty of careers

Uncertainty of health

Uncertainty of wealth

Uncertainty of soul

Everything we know is uncertain and we want to make everything certain.

But are we certain about that everything?

Do we all want to live a happy life with a booming career with the best of health, wealth and soul?

Yes, we all do

Then, why are we certain only about career and wealth?

Why are we uncertain about life, happiness, health and soul?

Yes, career and wealth lead to it all

But is life, happiness, health and soul non existent without career and wealth?

It’s uncertain, I believe

We don’t know because we haven’t tried

There’s no reason to try, it’s going as per plan

If the plan fails, if uncertainty shows it’s face

There’s no harm in trying

It would be difficult, it’s different than usual

It would take a toll, to find another way

We will fail, we will learn ways it doesn’t happen

Until we make it happen

When we make it happen

It will still be uncertain

We will still live

Live to do it all over again

Confusion

Confusion is a persons worst enemy. I realised this two years back when for the first time in my life I was confused and irritated that  I was confused. I barely managed to sort that out or should I say my first decision sorted that out for me making me realise that it was the wrong one. It was hard from there as the decision I had let go off was not very forgiving in the initial days. However, the point being it was during those days that I had come face to face with the fact that being confused can ruin your life.

The worse part is that I have been followed by confusion ever since. Even today I am confused, this time about life in general. I am a person who has always known what I want to do next. Or there has been something or the other going on  in my mind that I have to pick up next. It is a sad thing that I have lost purpose in my life. I do not know what I want to do next. I have lost insight. I have lost my passions. I have lost the will to pursue my passions.

Most of all I have lost my writing.

It is not that I have not been writing. In the past six months or so, I have been trying. I wrote a few lines and then I thought I moving away from the topic and so scrapped it. I wrote things a couple of times but not anything great. Today when I write, I write about how I have lost my life, my passion and my writing. I do not call this writing. I call this letting go. I have come to terms with the fact that I have got no inspiration. I need to inspire myself. How I am going to do that is something I am still trying to figure out. Though I know I will overcome this and soon. I say so because I know what is keeping me from letting my heart out and I don’t want to keep everything inside. I need to damn the world and concentrate on me. I am and should be the most important person in my life. I will work on it and will be stronger.

I feel lighter now, after long time…

Thanks PP for motivating me to write what I feel, because that is what I did today.